Night Moves

This week has seen an increase in night time disruptions that involve Mr. Dewey getting out of bed and completely dressed, including shoes, and once, a jacket. It happened seven times in one night, and there has only been one night this week without one. What’s most interesting about this is that he can rarely get dressed in the mornings without help, yet seems to be able to do so in the middle of the night. He is quite alert during these episodes, although ironically unaware of the incongruities in the situation.

I often hear him moving about before he gets fully clothed, and have always woken up before he has made any attempt to leave the house. Even so, it is quite unsettling to think that he could slip out of the house without me hearing him, should I be in a deep sleep. And every episode leaves me wide awake for hours after, with a heightened awareness of movement and sound. It’s not good for either one of us.

Often, these episodes involve “compelling messages” that are neither written, visual, or spoken. He can’t say what the message is, but he knows he needs to get up and get dressed. What he is expected to do after that is a mystery to us both. One episode included blaring fire alarms. I woke up to his panicked yells in a perfectly quiet house. Some episodes involve possibly real household noises. A mewling cat turns into beeps. Wind rustling through branches or the sound of the heat pump compressor turns into voices talking. But all of them involve a compulsion to get up, get dressed, and…?

The first night was the worst, with seven episodes. The next night, three. After that, a long conversation that included:

What do you think these messages mean?

What do you think getting dressed and leaving will do to help?

Have you tried saying “No” when you get a message like this?

Can you ignore the messages?

Can you call me for help before you get out of bed and dressed?

What do you think will happen if you leave?

Do these messages scare you?

There were no episodes the first night after this conversation, then only one each the last two nights. We have a short version of this conversation – more like a review of talking points – before bed now. Is it helping, or is it coincidental? Who knows? But it does seem to be sticking that 1) these episodes cause us both to lose sleep, 2) it would be a pain to be forced to get special locks on the doors, and 3) wandering off is not going to be helpful.

Our talking points are getting refined.

– noises happen, and cannot be avoided when other beings live in the house.

– most noises do not require investigation

– if you are afraid, ask for help

– you can simply ignore the messages

– don’t get dressed if it’s dark

– stay in bed unless you need to pee

We will continue this routine as long as needed. In the meantime, I will continue to research ways to prevent him from leaving the house on his own.